Hi Reader -
One of the most powerful ways to practice wholeness is learning to see both the light and the shadow in everything.
We humans tend to swing toward extremes.
We label things as all good or all bad,
healing or stuck,
success or failure.
But the truth is—there’s always a healthy version and a distorted version of every path. It’s when we go too far in one direction that we enter the shadow.
Even Mother Nature teaches us this.
When the sun is at its most intense, the shadows stretch the longest.
And when night is at its deepest, even a small flashlight can cast sharp, dramatic shadows.
It’s the dance of light and shadow that lets us see clearly—
but it’s the extremes of either side that warp what’s true.
On a recent coaching call, my mentor Alyssa Nobriga named this beautifully. She said:
“The shadow side of therapy is that we can get stuck in
healing.
There’s always something more to excavate, process, clear.
The shadow side of coaching is that we can get stuck in
becoming.
We strive endlessly to become a better version of ourselves— one that will finally be lovable, safe, worthy.”
I felt that truth deeply because I’ve lived both of those shadows.
Many seasons of my life have been all about becoming.
Self-improvement, goal setting, performance, productivity.
There was always a better version of me I hadn’t reached yet.
And other seasons have been dedicated to healing.
I poured myself into trauma work, inner child work, nervous system regulation. There was always one more layer to uncover.
Both of those paths, in their light, offered support.
But in their shadow, they fed the same lie:
That who I am right now isn’t enough.
That I need to fix myself—
either to heal something that happened in the past,
or to become someone more worthy in the future.
But here’s the insight that changed everything:
When you are truly present, there’s nothing to fix.
Presence pulls us out of the extremes.
It anchors us in the now—where there’s no pressure to be better, no story that says we’re behind, no constant reaching.
Presence is what I feel:
- In Shavasana at the end of a yoga class
- In the woods as the seasons shift quietly around me
- Around the dinner table when my family is laughing, sharing inside jokes, and just being
In those moments, I’m not trying to become.
I’m not trying to heal.
I’m simply here.
When you are truly present, there’s nothing to fix.
Read that again.
When you are truly present, there’s nothing to fix.
This doesn’t mean there’s no place for growth or healing.
Those paths are beautiful. Necessary, even.
But presence is what keeps them out of the shadow.
When we stay connected to presence,
our becoming is guided by curiosity, not shame.
Our healing is grounded in self-compassion, not urgency.
This is what it means to practice wholeness.
So here’s today’s gentle inquiry:
🌿 What parts of your inner work still carry the energy of fixing?
🌿 How does that energy change when you just let yourself be?
Remember:
You are loved.
All parts of you.
Just as they are—right now.
No fixing required.
In presence,
brooke