What if this year was different?

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Hi Reader -

Years ago, after a depleting holiday season, one of my best friends asked me to do something rather unexpected.

She said to me,

“Brooke, this happens to you every year.
You always get burned out.
You always get overwhelmed.
You always have some hard family interaction you’re dreading at a family gathering…

I want you to put a reminder in your phone for next October:

REMINDER: Sit down and intentionally create a vision for what you want to experience for the holidays.

For the record, everyone deserves a friend who will be deeply honest with you in helping you confront your own suffering.

She was right that every year was the same.
She was right that every year I went into the same holiday overwhelm patterns.
She was right that every year I complained about hard extended family relationships.

EVERY YEAR.

And if she was tired of my pattern, imagine how exhausted I was?

I had to live it!

I did as she directed and set a reminder in my phone for the following October, nine months in the future.

When October came around, the reminder popped up.

At first I ignored it.

Why?

Because I was feeling good!
I wasn’t overwhelmed in that moment!

So of course I assumed that this year would be different!

BAHA HA HA HAA.

Patterns are sneaky.

And the sneakiest part is that they often don’t care about your good intentions.

When the overwhelm started up just like it always did, I eventually set an hour aside to create a vision for how I wanted that year to be different.

I chose a mantra.
I changed my expectations.
I simplified.

And while this did help some things on the surface…

After 40+ years of practice, my BODY knows these patterns too.

The holidays have become associated with overwhelm, difficult family dynamics, disappointment, and stress.

MY BODY REMEMBERS.

And when it falls into that well-worn groove, it’s not going to fall for any positive thinking tricks.

For many years I would judge and shame myself for my inability to overcome this sabotaging holiday pattern. The worst parts of me always came out. No matter how many “tools” I employed, I have yet to experience a completely peaceful holiday season.

As I write this, I’m even thinking about last Christmas 9 months ago.
I spent half of the day crying and by myself.
ON CHRISTMAS DAY.

Yes, dear reader.
The holidays are hard for me.
Even with all the tools I had for support.

One of the beliefs I still have to watch out for is the belief that healing means you never get triggered again.

Or the belief that being triggered or having shadow patterns means something is wrong with you.

The truth is, humans are supposed to get triggered.

And while there are many things we can do to soften those triggers, the most important thing we can learn isn’t how to never get triggered again, but how to meet yourself with compassion when it happens.

How can you support yourself through activation?
How can you create more capacity for whatever your own big triggers are?

The timing of my 40 Days of Peace is by design.

It runs October 12–November 20.
​(Up until the week before American Thanksgiving.)

I want to help you give yourself the greatest gift before the holiday haze hits.
(My own hardest season.)

What if you entered the holidays this year with more capacity than you usually have?

Imagine spending 40 days creating more capacity.
Imagine spending 40 days practicing compassion with yourself.
Imagine spending 40 days learning simple, practical, body-based tools that you can use to more gracefully move through the stressors of life.

These tools work directly with the nervous system and brain to create new patterns on the deepest level:

The level of the body.

It’s still a great idea to be intentional and pick your mantras or simplify your life.

Imagine what is possible when you know how to bring your body and nervous system into the equation as well.

My lows aren’t as low, and they don’t last as long. I recover so much faster.

But my favorite part?

I no longer have to judge and shame myself for my reactions.

I can offer compassion and patiently be with myself regardless of what’s happening in my nervous system.

It’s not personal.

It’s just the life of being a human.

So what patterns do you have?
What are your biggest triggers?
Would it be a gift to you—and your loved ones—to learn how to practice peace?

Come practice 40 Days of Peace with me.

You are a creator.
Feel, be, see, say, do.
The light in me honors the light in you.

With Peace,

Brooke