I've spent most of my life as a black-and-white thinker. Everything fit so neatly into the boxes of right or wrong, good or bad.
Until, all of a sudden, that didn’t work anymore.
Seeing nuance — and even more so, allowing nuance to exist in our worldview — is a sign of spiritual evolution and maturity. Black-and-white thinking isn’t bad; it’s just developmental. (I say this to myself every time I find myself back in that place, to offer compassion to the parts of me that still go into a black and white freak out.)
Speaking of which… did you know that rigid black-and-white thinking is also a sign of a dysregulated nervous system?
It makes so much sense.
The moments I feel highly triggered are always the moments I revert to black-and-white perceptions. They go hand in hand. My mind and body want to feel safe, so they instantly judge something as all good or all bad to create clarity and control.
But once I can offer love and acceptance to the parts of me that are afraid — and regulate my nervous system — I can return to the middle way.
The middle way is the path of wholeness. It honors the good found in both sides of a polarity and softens the shadows that form when we cling too tightly to either extreme at the expense of the other.
I recently heard a nervous system expert speak about “The Sacred Third.” She described those moments when our minds become so locked into all-or-nothing thinking that we can’t see anything in between.
She invited us to ask: Is there a sacred third option here?
We don’t always see it unless we ask from the heart — with faith that it exists.
And more often than not, that sacred third is the middle way.
So, dear one… Where is black-and-white thinking showing up for you right now? Is there a middle way? A sacred third?
What might become possible if you opened to a more balanced path forward?
This is the practice of wholeness.
You are loved. All parts of you.
Delightfully, brooke
P.S. As part of my project to re-record all of my past podcast episodes, there was one I chose not to include — not because it lacked value, but because it no longer aligns with the focus of my rebrand.
It also happens to be the #1 most requested episode: “There’s More Than One Way to the Tree.”Originally written specifically for church members, this story no longer fits the direction of my new podcast, which is intentionally inclusive of all spiritual paths.
But after so many heartfelt requests, I’ve decided to share the written version on my website.
It’s the story of my personal faith expansion after a lifetime in the Mormon Church — a journey rooted in the search for a middle way.
If this episode ever spoke to you — or you’ve wanted to revisit or more easily share it with others — you can find it HERE.