Harmonious Relationships
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Recently, in a client coaching session I asked the golden question. “What do you deeply want?” Her reply? Have you ever wished for this too? HARMONY The musical definition of harmony may be slightly different than the way we often use this term in regular life. Harmony in music happens when two different notes are played at the same time. They are in a state of interdependence. Each voice sings its own melody and the combination of individual notes creates richness and depth. In relationships, we often say we want harmony, when what we are really wanting is unison. We want those around us to sing the same notes we are. In music and life, unison can be beautiful. But after a while, it can also get boring and “one note”. Harmony occurs when we allow some differentiation. We allow some variety into our experience. We make space for authenticity and allow each person to be who they are–which likely means we’re not usually singing the same notes. Sometimes we do, and sometimes we don’t. Something to notice though… There’s a difference between two people singing entirely different songs (literally not on the same page), and two people who are committed to singing together, but searching for a way that still gives each of them the space and freedom to be fully themselves. Harmony lives in that second place. Admittedly, some harmonies are more pleasing to the ear than others. Dissonant harmonies create tension, but they also make the resolution moments of the music so much more impactful. (As a composer, I looooooooove dissonance! As a wife and mother? I’m learning to be more comfortable with it ;) Music that only allows for happy sounds can sound boring real quick. Think about the music that truly speaks to your soul… Chances are it’s filled with major and minor moments, and represents a fuller scope of the human emotional experience. You feel seen and heard because the music mirrors the complexity of who you are. Same with life. If you find yourself experiencing any dissonance in your relationships right now, remember that this is part of what creates the larger beauty of the music. Resolution doesn’t have to mean singing the same note. It simply means finding the harmony that allows each person to be authentically who they are–in a way that creates peace. So here’s the question to contemplate: Where in your life are you expecting unison when harmony is actually needed? You are loved. Delightfully, brooke PS, if you know someone who would enjoy this email, If you’d like to go a little deeper:→ Begin here: Free Meditation → Continue your practice: Meditation Library →Get support: Book a Clarity Call If you have any questions, just reply and ask! |